Here I come again (Introduction)

Note: This must be the first entry of the blog, but I am technically useless.

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So, here I am again to heal my life through my writing. It relaxes me, I kind of need to tell some stories. Who I am? Where I come from? What’s the story and why I feel like sharing it?

Woman in my forties. 

Powerful but weak. 
Deep thinker but obsessed with superficial media.
Mother of three. And really three little monkeys demand a lot of time.
Unemployed. Used to have a great professional career in the City, London. But that is part of my past and somehow is so deeply buried there, that I don’t recognise myself any more as someone developing a profitable and rewarding career. I truly don’t know who that person is, how to find it or re-connect with her again. 

The bank I was working for closed while I was in my third maternity leave, and a chain of unpredictable events took place and left me unemployed, full handed with three kiddos, starting a new life in a new country, and not knowing any more how I landed in that part of my life.

It was all too quick to swallow. Deepest feelings of lost were mixing constantly with my breakfast, my morning run to the school, the empty hours without kids, and of course the night rest, where I ended up crying and fantasising in front of Easyjet website about booking an spontaneous flight for the next few hours and take myself back to my old life.

I felt lonely, sad and totally lost. 

But let me tell you where I landed. Is not the most beautiful city in Europe, but it has its charm. Is the city my grandparents picked many years ago to settle for good and is the city whereto, I decided it was worth to make an adventurous move from my beloved London. Now I can see the sun light day after day. No interruptions. As something normal :)

So, in the middle of my life, after many years abroad, with so much interesting and beautiful stories in my back, I landed where it all started. And although, initially, I thought it would be a clean, fresh start, I was SO wrong. 

I have never-ever been as wrong as then. When I decided that changing my life upside-down was the cleverest idea to welcome my forties: with a blank page, in a blank book. That fresh start became a blank empty space that somehow paralysed me.